“Dysmorphia”

By Melia Hudgin

This song is originally produced and was written about my struggles with body dysmorphia. Body dysmorphia is a real mental illness and I wanted to highlight some of the things I deal with on a regular basis from this disorder in this song. I’m hoping through my music that some people who are facing stigma with mental illness can be comforted by the fact that they are not alone. Mental illness that is expressed through art, media and performance help end preconceived negative notions about these disorders.

What’s something you could tell me about myself

that i don’t already know

how could you teach me how to be myself

when i hate who i’ve become

can somebody tell me what the fuck i’m doing here

can somebody tell me why i can’t look in the mirror

looking for a sense of direction

because i’m getting no where with you

tell me what you see in my reflection

because i’m blind to the truth

this body dysmorphia

i don’t know who i am

this body dysmorphia

i’ll never know

Ohhh where do I go

What do I do

I’m so fucking confused

since you’ve been gone

i don’t have a reason to live

all i ever wanted

was to find somebody i could fall in love with

could you

love me better than i can

because i can’t (i can’t do it, no)

this body dysmorphia

i don’t know who i am

this body dysmorphia

i’ll never know

this body dysmorphia

i don’t know who i am

this body dysmorphia

i’ll never know