By Chloe Milenk
My heavy eyelids flutter off into this realm of uncertainty,
Can’t seem to see what my normal eye can see,
I don’t want to believe.
But the thing is, the thing is, this shit is getting to me.
In this unknown dimension misplaced faces seem so familiar,
only cones for eyes and no mouths to speak words.
My restless mind runs til I start to feel absurd.
The eternal echo of a ravens coo calling my name ,
I’m trying to reconstruct reality, make sense of the low grumbles my ears don’t want to acknowledge.
I don’t know this place
Let me out, let me out
I’m trying so hard to remember your face, to remember myself into a better state
Chasing hesitant tomorrow’s in hopes of anything but this estate.
I’m equally there and not there,
like I’m being controlled by a master puppeteer.
This domain has the ability to reanimate your veins,
to make you feel like your being ripped down attached by weighted chains.
Letting all your worst worldly angst come to being, and stop your third eye from seeing.
Burrowing it’s way through your brains smallest crease,
until you have no option but to let them feast.
Like a cold wet blanket being thrown over my soul,
The tentacles of night grasping my shadows I physically recoil.
Seeds planted in the aurora ignored until gloom,
Those demons, you let them into your room.
Becoming auto tuned to the tune of someone else’s instrument,
leading down a tunnel of lower and lower descent.
The night bares witness to the madness of my minds pendulum.
What if I told you monsters were real?
That they don’t just creep in your head when you’re unguarded,
That they want you to fail until you no longer want to fight.
They tell you to keep believing us, we know best, our way of doing things is right.
I start to sweat trying not to welcome the malicious frequencies,
Tossing and turning,
speaking words that make no sense.
Am I safe here in my bed while I fight for my own innocence,
Running looking for where the crying is coming from.
My legs are starting to go numb.
Let me out, let me out.
Feeling like it’s too much,
I’m starting to come undone.
Restful chaos envelopes my sleeping mind,
Watching my own back, not ignoring what may lurk behind.
I start to provoke these unseen incidents,
start to challenge its pathetic malevolence.
Taking the words of my attackers and sending them back with ten fold force.
It’s begging at my feet.
I know you’re a lucid one,
take it easy on us...please don’t have too much fun.
A coward in it truest sense reveals itself.
Having the audacity to try to bring me down in my pinnacle of health?
Whoever you are, wherever you’re at,
ten toes to the ground tell the beast get back!
Let me out, let me out.
It cries out in pain, I’m not used to this kind of clear mind please refrain!
I’m no longer a puppet in this nightmare.
My ears begin ringing, I hear the devil singing.
Come to me, I have what’s yours,
don’t you dare just stand there and ignore.
Indeed what’s at hand is mine.
My hope was increasing, but now is on the decline.
Wandering through empty space,
Like I’ve been put in a strange labyrinth,
retched figments torment my slumber.
I can’t do this anymore!
This is not what I signed up for.
So tense so scared,
questioning; is this night terror real?
My body is impaired,
chilling cold all around me still trying to stay the bravest;
Of all the things that go thump in the night, my heart still beats the loudest.
Sour and vile smells saturate the air,
I look down in complete and utter despair.
My feet are paralyzed to the ground,
my chest feels like it’s being pinned down.
Let me out, let me out!
You want out do you?
Well you know what I want.
Let me sew your mouth shut,
so what if you grow gaunt.
Dark shadows tip toe past,
Singing their sickeningly sweet lullaby.
God laughs, and laughs at how hard they try.
No this place is not for me, I’m here but not here.
This is the truth so let your unsightly head rear.
This timeless journey fills my whole being,
The blind man now becomes all-seeing.
If seeing is believing, what do we call the things in our dreams?
What if I told you monsters were still real?
That they don’t hide in your closet or under your bed.
Not in the shadows of the mountains and woods.
They may be right under your nose,
Be careful or they might take your soul.
What if I told you,
that they don’t just linger in the nighttime.
What if I told you that,
Chaos is now a very good friend of mine.